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Will Durst: Crashing glitches


  Note: Will Durst is a comedian and you may find some of his material offensive, or worse, not funny. His views do not necessarily reflect those of KALW.

Hey guys,

Will Durst with a bit of good news for a change. Republican politicians are finally interested in the internet. At least they're no longer referring to it as tubes and tunnels and chutes and ladders. They're holding hearings into what has gone wrong with the Obamacare website, demonstrating concern that it may not be working well -  which is real similar to having cobras worry that the mouse door is chronically unlocked.

What's funny is the sight of these white grandfatherly types - who couldn't tell a glitch from a sneetch -complaining about something they have the same familiarity with as a calico cat does with calculus. The thing is, they're perfectly right. Even  Democrats agree the website technology for Obamacare is so outdated that it looks Health & Human Services rescued it from Compuserve's trash using a dial up modem. There are at least four or five areas of this country where you could have gotten a class of sixth graders to construct a better site during study hall. It's the ultimate techie nightmare. More crashes than Windows Vista through 27 stories of skylights. A healthcare portal with all the compassion and efficiency of the DMV. Coming soon: leeches! Although many folks claim that plenty of licensed barbers are already caucusing with the House majority.

Face it, if the government created 'The Cloud', it would be known as 'The Fog'. But by focusing their attention on the website the GOP seems to be signaling that after trying to repeal it 50 times, and going so far as to shutting down the government to get rid of it, they're finally onboard with Obamacare, and just want to straighten things out and make them better. In other words, they're now complaining about the menu, not the meal. 

Outraged and outrageous, Durst is as current as today’s headlines, as accurate as a sniper, and universally acknowledged by even his peers as the nation’s foremost political comic.